Mad as a Hatter
by Cookie-Loving Kiara
Summary: Sequel to 'Mad as a March Hare'. This time, Nick joins the insanity. What will happen when there are TWO insane brothers? One-shot.


Disclaimer: I don't not own Left 4 Dead.

**A/N:** To Temptest Hound, what were you doing in a desert? Holiday camping trip? To Fatty Waffey, I can't help but feel that it didn't seem like it was about Zoey and Nick being sister and brother. To tell you the truth, it felt like a family fic with _everyone_ instead of the two... Oh - and to reply to your review on 'Sibling Problems' (which has already been changed), I'm guessing it was something near M-rated shit. Please tell me it ain't yaoi. Happy Valentime's Day to you too! May your life be full of love, family or true romance!

Couldn't wait any longer, I wanted to publish this!

Trust me, this fanfiction's funnier than the first one, and that's good news.

Wanted to add _something_ connected to a hatter, so there'll be a hat in this. *twirls in a circle*

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Who knew insanity could spread like that?

Not Nick, that's for sure.

Spending time with an insane person had affected him.

He never thought it'd spread like... like...

Green Flu.

~.~.~.~.~

Dammit. Dammit. Dammit dammit dammit.

Nick was losing it. It had been nearly two weeks of Ellis throwing anything he could throw at them, giggling like a maniac, being as hyperactive as a rabid squirrel on coffee and adrenaline shots and changing his moods worse than the wind.

The conman sighed when he heard the mechanic's laughter. He held up a hand, and caught the roll of toilet paper that Ellis threw. "That's it," He got up. "I'm bringing you to the asylum."

"Ah'm not insane," Ellis stated, arms folded stubbornly. "So y' can't take meh."

"So you say, so you say..." he grumbled. He didn't know if his sanity was leaking or insanity was building up.

"C'mon!" Ellis smacked him hard on the back. Nick coughed. "Try tuh have some _fun!_"

"Look Overalls," he growled. "Nothing's fun with you recking every single bullshit in the house."

"Well mayb' if ya actually _smile-_"

"Shut it." Nick snapped and walked up to his room. Looking back over his shoulder, he saw the southerner shrug and giggle, mumbling to himself. The pessimist rolled his eyes.

It couldn't get any worse than this.

When Nick entered his room, he went to sit on his bed. "Dammit," he scowled to himself. "I think I'm losing it."

A pause.

"And if I do?"

Another pause.

Nick shook his head, trying to snap out of what was happening. "Great, now I'm hearing things." he hissed.

"Well, welcome tuh da club!"

He jumped at the sudden voice, before glaring at the door. "Don't. Do. That."

"Fine." Ellis' voice replied, but he stood outside, leaning against the closed door.

"You do realise you admitted your insanity, right?"

"Naw, it ain't insanity," the mechanic chuckled. "It's crehtiverty*. An' it's fun."

Nick rolled his eyes again; he got up quietly and creeped towards the door; then he swung it opened and jumped back quickly.

"Whoa!"

_Thud!_

"Ow!" Ellis glared, before he got up slowly.

"Now _that_ was fun," Nick smirked.

"Yea, ha ha ha." Ellis grumbled.

Well, that's a mood change for once. Maybe the day wouldn't be so bad after all.

~.~.~.~.~

Wow.

It felt like floating on a cloud.

No worries, total freedom.

Who knew insanity was so carefree?

Day two; the previous flew by so fast, so crazily.

Coach rolled his eyes. Two idiots were not the best things to have in a house. About haf a hour ago, Ellis and Nick had more or less destroyed a quater of the house before they were placed outside like pet puppies.

"I think they're really going insane," Rochelle sighed. She was the one who went to drag the two brothers out - it was hard; they had finally agreed when she allowed them to-

_Crash! Giggle!_

-have a tea party.

Outside, cups, filled with or without the now 'cold'** tea, flew across the yard like snowballs during a game, same went for the plates that were like frisbees instead; maniacal laughter filled the air. Half of the sugar cup was spilled and the two males were running around the table like children, basically because Nick stole Ellis' cap.

"Mine now!"

"Givid back!"

Coach stared out the window with a 'WTF' look.

_Crash!_

"Ha ha! Nice throw!"

"Fuck da chair! Givid back mah cap or Ah'll smash the _table_ on yer stupid lil' brain!"

This time, Rochelle came to watch the show, too.

_Crash! Clatter!_

"Gah! Fucking teapot!"

"Serves ya right!" There were more crazy giggles. "Catch dis!"

(More crashes and shatters.)

Nick ran pass the window; he was wearing the mechanic's hat, his suit stained brown with tea and hair, face and shoulders looked like it had been dusted with white powder because of the sugar on them; a Cheshire cat grin was plastered to his face. Ellis ran pass too, slightly behind the older man. His hair was messy and his blue eyes had an angry and annoyed glint. But he stopped, looked at the confused and bewilded two with a now happy experssion, and waved at them. Nick, who didn't noticed the hick had stopped, crash right into him from behind. Both of the insane brothers fell down.

"Oof!"

Coach had stepped out the backdoor to help them when Ellis grabbed his cap back and ran pass him, into the house.

"Come back here!" Nick ran in after him; he turned and ran into the kitchen and came out in just two mere seconds, carrying knifes.

"Oooh! A game o' throwin' knifes! Hit meh! Hit meh!" Ellis taunted with a laugh, he waved his arms in the air as he ran.

_Thwunk!_

"Y' missed meh!"

_Thwank!_

"Why dya keep aimin' f'r da wall?"

_Thwank!_

"Ah'm bored," Ellis yawned.

_Thwunk!_

"Betcha couldn't hit a whore even if she was drunk!"

"Stay still so I can fucking kill you!"

_Thwank-thwunk!_

Things were getting out of hand, and Rochelle and Coach had to do what they had to do.

~.~.~.~.~

Day eighteen for Ellis; day five for Nick. Three days ago, they were sent away to 'cure' them of their 'sickness'.

The three sat in the bare room; straitjackets bounded their arms. Insanity sparkled in their crazy eyes and they were all giggling softly. Nick heard footsteps nearing, and grinned at Ellis and the other man who had shoulder-length black hair, Skrym was his name. They all grinned back.

The doctor and nurse clicked the door open quietly...

And three screams erupted and filled the room.

Oh, what fun insanity brings.

Oh, what freedom.

Well, at least till you get caught.

_Snicker..._

* Betcha didn't understand THAT. :D The real word was/is 'creativity'.

** Room temperature food is what parents call 'cold'.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Hope y'all didn't read 'Skrym' as 'Skyrim'!~ Damn, I feel like adopting him now... :/ And the endings awkward (again). *sigh*

I dunno if asylums allow multiply people with the same problems in the same room, so do forgive me if I got it wrong.

I actually intended Nick to get a top hat or something, but that didn't flow in the river at all.

Pleasant days and peaceful nights. *giggles*


End file.
